May the Force be with you!

I have a Jedi living at my house. Because of said Jedi, I have learned many Jedi things that I was previously ignorant about, such as:

1) Jedi's don't eat real food like steak or chicken. Jedi's only digest food that is already in liquid form, preferably milkshakes and smoothies, though yogurt will do in a pinch.

2) Any piece of brown or black fabric will do as a cloak, as long as it is stapled under the chin to make a hood. This includes random pieces of fabric, tablecloths, clothing and towels.

3) A karate gi makes a perfectly acceptable Jedi uniform. Even a filthy one that has been worn and slept in for several days in a row. Jedi's are way too busy fighting the dark side to do their laundry.

4) When beheading your baby brother, two lightsabers are much better than one, and slashing across the throat is much too amatuerish. You must use both lightsabers simualtaneously in a slashing motion across one another-it's much more realistic.

5) Listening to the force is much more important than listening to your mother. Especially when it is time to take a bath or come to dinner.