B dug the juggling bag out of the garage last night. We're going to the IJA convention in July and thought it best to start getting back into shape. See, I may identify as a juggler over there in my profile, but the truth is, B and I do very little juggling nowadays. Lucky for us you can't really "forget" to juggle, but if you could we certainly would have forgotten by now! I opened the bag this morning, and there before me was a heartbreaking sight. All of our juggling balls, the good ones, the $8 a piece ones, were nothing but scraps. Birdseed was all over the bottom of the bag, along with mouse droppings and shredded paper. So our juggling bag was a mouse home and buffet over the winter. And now the only juggling balls we have are the 5 new ones I bought B for Christmas (a purchase I hestitated on, but now I am really, really glad we have them!). It's not a huge loss-I only juggle 4 balls anyway, B will do 5, when we pass we mostly use clubs. But those were the balls that we learned to juggle with. They were our first big equipment purchase. B and I were still dating when we bought those and they sat on the mantle at our wedding. They were getting too soft, and some of the material had gotten thin and a little stretched out. One ball even had a piece of tape on it covering a hole that one of the kids bit in it at one time. So they needed to be replaced anyway. But the loss reminds me of the years that have passed, and the days when those balls never would have been shoved in the garage. Juggling balls have been replaced with errands and cleaning and teaching and the full days of working and parenting. I guess it is significant that bit by bit we are losing the material possessions of our past, as we are continually growing and changing ourselves. But the memories that linger of those days......so hard to let go.